The wheels on the bus go round and round... over your teammates?

Ever been thrown under the bus?  I have and, OUCH, it hurts. Many teachers and all administrators work in some form of a School Learning Community (SLC), Professional Learning Community (PLC) or interdisciplinary team.  Ask yourself one question: have I ever done anything to undermine the professional reputation of ANY of my colleagues?

First let me define what I think qualifies as "throwing someone under the bus."

You are a thrower if you have ever done any of the following:

1.  Purposely reveal the flaws of another when your boss or higher up is discussing a concern they have about your performance. Example: "John, I want to discuss your lack of punctuality." John says "Oh, I didn't think it was an issue because my supervisor said it was okay to come in late... Rick and I come in about 15 minutes late each day."

2.  If you've ever taken sides on an issue based on GOSSIP.  By giving the sheer appearance of approval (not saying anything, head nodding, or eyebrow raising with bewilderment).  If you do this to a teammate while listening to gossip without aligning your loyalties with the person  you work most directly with... you're a thrower.  I'm not saying agree with anything unethical but don't say "you'll look into it."  That implies that you have some sort of supervisory power over your equal.  You don't, back off.  Let the people vent and try to say something like "I'm sure there is more to this than we know."  There usually is... 

                            Look of bewilderment=agreeing with you

3.  If you fingerpoint.  When you cast blame so easily on others and let it be known publicly, especially to subordinates if you are in management, you are a thrower.  Revealing that there is division in the management undermines your authority.  Believe me, it does.  How can you ever speak of teamwork as a manager when you openly criticize or highlight the mistakes of another?  Saying things like "I'm sure Kyla will do it...when she gets around to it." WOW! You're a jerk. 

Sometimes we do this without knowing we do this. This week was a tough week in administration for me folks.  A colleague and several instructors left tread marks on my chest.  I am earning my stripes as an admin.  I'm learning that folks are either REALLY nice to you or REALLy mean to you.

I'm processing what it means to be known by all and hated by most.  Not because you've done something to offend someone, but because of your role.  * sigh *  I asked for this. I love my work.  The kids are the easy part.  But there are a couple of principles I will NEVER, EVER compromise, no matter how much heat I'm feeling from others.

I practice loyalty, deference, and the art of being humble.  I've learned these lessons the hard way.  I believe I learned these principles the hard way because it was time for a major paradigm shift in my life.

Loyalty:  In my last position, I freely shared my opinion with others.  That was a bad idea.  I learned the hard way. Now, as long as there are no ethical conflicts, I back my teammates up.  If I saw ANYONE on my campus do something I deemed questionable, I'd ask them to explain.  When people create stories around what the THINK is the truth... you risk loyalty.  How do you expect a person to go to bat for you when you've said some not so nice things about them?

Deference:  Everyone, no matter what their role is on my campus, no matter how long they've been there, has something to teach me.  The personal philosophies I hold dear in life are a result of the interactions I've had with people over time who have left me with something profound.  I'm a new administrator, everyone who's been there has something to teach me. The custodians, the clerks, the teachers, anyone.  Deference, showing respect to those who are wiser, older, more experienced.  The MINUTE you think you know more because you are of a certain title, you've lost the connection with others before you've even started.

Being Humble:

I try very hard to not take the fact that someone has entrusted me, my professional discretion and my judgement for granted.  I am very fortunate to have landed my position.  Because of that, things that once bothered me no longer bother me.  People can gossip, lie, throw me under the bus... it doesn't matter.  You know why?  Because last year I was without a job.  My family was undergoing a MAJOR life change.  My husband's career was in transition and I was a student in graduate school, for the second time, PRAYING I landed a job by the time my husband's medical retirement came through from the Marine Corps.  Every held on firmly to every dollar.  For the first time in my life, I thought I would have to seek government assistance just to be able to afford food for our two kids.  I'm revealing a lot.  I say that to say, I'm grateful for my position.  In the past 18 months I've matured A LOT.  I needed that struggle to make me realize that I am not entitled to ANYTHING.  You don't warrant respect, you earn it.  I practice the golden rule.

I wish everyone did.

"Butt" what? Is there an answer to the sagging dilemma?

Is the attire of a student an effective indicator of their academic strength?

The sagging pants dilemma is plaguing my campus. I have to be honest, its exhausting trying to monitor the pants of young people on our campus. I can't walk from my office to the bathroom without stopping at least five to six people who act as if the "no sagging" rule is new to them. It takes a lot of man hours and power enforcing this rule too. I could be spending more time refining teacher practice by conducting walk through observations. Instead, I'm in my office, not being visible, inputting discipline for things like "sagging."   As much as I find it tiring to enforce, when I see the young men and women on my campus wearing their pants this way, I feel the disapproval of wearing one's pants so low rise in my blood pressure. I get this visceral, negative reaction and it goes to my brain and then to my mouth.

At the end of every day, I add up the number of dress code violations sitting on my desk, I
can't help but wonder... is this doing any good?


So now you may be wondering if I'm one of those hippie teachers who promotes existentialism and free expression. No, I'm not... not exactly.

I can't help but wonder, however, why is there such disdain of sagging in Western culture?  We all know we judge people based on looks.  We all know, and let's be honest here, that there is a perceived fear of Black men.  Especially Black men in groups, sagging.


Okay, I'll admit, I don't want to see any young person's underwear.  But while we are being honest, we all have made fashion choices in our young lives that we WOULD not revisit now, correct.  I can think of one: Cross colors!

I used to wear these loud clothing articles with pride.  Do clothing choices warrant disciplinary actions that could result in discouraging students from being successful in school.  I'm thinking so.  I think it is wrong to judge a student's ability based on their lack of conforming to the very Eurocentric mindset of American culture.  Let's face it, many Americans would feel a lot safer if all their Black men looked like this:

Instead of this:

Or Especially This:

So, back to the original question.  If dress code violations make administrative staff spend time on discipline, is implementing a dress code violation about sagging pants worth it?  Also, is it really fair to discipline a kid for how they dress?  Now when I ask the last question, I mean something that's not too offensive like short shorts, bra tops, etc... 

This blog entry was more of a discussion starter.  Should students be punished for a fashion statement that is a teenage thing now?  I'm not so sure.  I think everyone should just wear uniforms.